Change and Changing

“There is nothing permanent except CHANGE.”
– Heraclitus (Died 475 B.C.)

In nature change is obvious. Every day I see the changes from light to dark, seasons changing and places that have changed. Change is inevitable, and I am pretty good at accepting those changes.

Making changes in my OWN life has usually been dramatic for me. The one constant has always been ME. I have been the one present for those changes, so I needed to learn to become clearer about my part in making better choices for the next stage and changes in my life. It took me surrendering and learning that I am not in control of everything. I needed to learn it was my SOURCE’s
Way NOT MY Way for my life. I can plan, make goals and set deadlines, but I am NOT in control of every outcome! I have been deluding and frustrating myself when I believed this in the past.

The other thing that made change so difficult for me was my expectations of how things SHOULD be. Those phony pictures in my head, the DISNEY version of the perfect family and the prince arriving to save me, were FALSE expectations. When I look back at my life resisting CHANGE has just cost me a lot of undue suffering, which today I am learning to let go of. Yeah, FREEDOM!

I remember hearing about new way of seeing change at a workshop at least 35 years ago, from a very smart young man who had to use a wheelchair all the time. He had completely accepted this huge change in his life. He said that he had seen many able-body people who were disabled in their thinking and attitudes. At the time, I did not realize and was not aware that I was one of the people of whom he was speaking.

My sister-in-law, who is a beautiful human being called me as I was getting ready to publish this blog. She is in my life now and is an extraordinary woman who had a spinal cord injury almost 30 years ago when she was in her thirties.
She had to change her whole life. At first, after her accident, she said that she felt rage at her new fate. She said that she has transmuted that rage into positive action. Sometimes the only positive action she can do is pray.

As you can tell, I love inspirational stories about people who are making great changes. May 9th, I heard about a program that is helping convicts change their lives. It was on PRI (Public Radio International) during the show “The Takeaway” with John Hockenberry. A community college program is retraining inmates in Walla-Walla, Washington. Take a listen:

Years ago I heard another quote:

“No man ever steps in the same river twice, for it’s not the same river and he’s not the same man.”
– Heraclitus



“There is nothing PERMANENT except CHANGE.” –

Heraclitus (535 BC-475 BC)

January 2015

January 2014

With things in our world such as the weather, change is very obvious.

January 2015

January 2015

Also with the changing seasons, sometimes we humans witness and accept other changes readily. Other times we are less accepting.

Queen Anne's lace

Queen Anne’s lace Summer 2014

In the late spring and summer, Queen Anne’s lace or wild carrot grows wild where I take walks frequently. It is near the end of summer, and you can see that some of it is already starting to change (in the far right corner)

Queen Ann'e lace fall

Queen Anne’s lace in the fall

In the late fall Queen Anne’s lace looks like this.

Sometimes I start feeling a little sad when the fall ends because I love that season and the changes in the leaves. My attachment to keeping even the seasons from changing brings on my own sadness, as if I could logically stop or control winter from coming! So when I resist change I CREATE my own suffering.

The present moment
contains past and future.
The secret of transformation,
is in the way we handle this very moment.” –

Thich Nhat Hanh

Believe me, I have tried to stop other changes in my life in the past. I have suffered until I finally surrendered and started to accept changes over time.

opening rose

opening rose

Since becoming more willing to embrace change and be less controlling, I have become happier and learned more about myself. I have become open to new possibilities, and my life has been opening like a flower. With practice and some guidance, living in the moment and accepting change without fear has become more possible for me now.

When we humans are unable to embrace change, particularly with how we treat and accept ourselves and each other, this old saying applies to us:

“The more things change, the more they are the same.”  – Alphonse Karr  (1808-1890)

A hopeful “antidote” to Karr’s view about changing human behavior might be this TED Talk by B.J. Fogg.

How do you deal with CHANGE?